Ok, don't faint I am blogging twice in one day (it does happen but not often). I have felt the need to blog today for my own sanity (read blog below first).
I knew when we had another baby it would be somewhat difficult to take care of both of them effectively. I never imagined some of the days I would have. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE our girls and you can tell that by most of the entries on this blog but a Mama gotta vent every now and then.
Today during the up-chuck (explained in entry below) episode I knew I had to bathe Mili because she got it in her hair. I could not or would not stand that all day. At the same time this episode is happening Sadie is in her crib waking from a short nap (too short). She starts crying like she always does wanting me to come and get her. I was still cleaning Mili up and so Sadie decided I was not coming fast enough so she starts SCREAMING. I continue to clean Mili enough to let her down from the table and start her bath water. After getting Mili's clothes ready for the bath Sadie sounds like a fog horn in my ear (keep in mind she is still in the other room).
I got Sadie's seat ready for her to sit in it as I bathed Mili. I put Sadie in the seat in the hall outside our bathroom (for those of you that have been here to visit you know there is not much room for yourself in our bathroom much less three of us). Sadie continued to SCREAM and so I decided to bring her in the bathroom in her seat. I call Mili to her bath and she starts crying because she doesn't want to take a bath right now. Now both are crying (SCREAMING). I am about to pull my hair out so I start screaming which scared Sadie even more and made her louder.
After I calmed myself down, I tried to explain to Mili that her crying was not helping Sadie calm down and if she would calm down then maybe Sadie would. Then Mili stopped for a minute and then her sad cry came on.. She said, "I sorry I make Sadie sad, you forgive me?" I had to explain again (all while Sadie is still SCREAMING) that it was not Mili's fault it was just worse when she is crying too. Mili stopped for a bit and Sadie is still SCREAMING. While bathing Mili she said, "Why Sadie sad Mommy?" I had no idea so I couldn't answer that question. Mili kept saying as I got her out of the tub, "Mommy, I need Sadie to smile." (I would have paid money to see that happen at this point).
With both crying or screaming through more than half (Sadie the entire) time we were in the very tiny bathroom I was about to go insane. I was trying really hard to keep my composure but I am sure a tear or two probably escaped.
After dressing Mili, I picked up Sadie and she immediately stopped screaming. I am so glad she is not old enough for a good old fashioned whippin' because she would have gotten one. I was so mad that all of that was about me picking her up. She was fine the entire time I was drying Mili's hair. I am not even going to try to figure this one out.
I just thought I would share this since most moms are scared to share stories like this one in fear that they don't look capable or that things are not what they are suppose to seem. I have a friend who has some issues about what she feels as a mother and I think a lot of that comes from moms NOT sharing the bad along with the good. New moms have this preconceived notion that everything is suppose to look perfect and it is NOT. Being a mother (especially a stay-at-home mom) is hard work.
I still wouldn't trade it for an outside job for anything but I am tired and will go now.